Tresspassing Signs Everywhere!

Posted on: September 4th, 2013 by No Comments

Where is the Road?
Rules of the Road

So here I was looking at the trespassing sign on the side of the tree. Avis and I were bouncing along the dirt road, looking at the landscape and taking pictures of the nature and beauty of these beautiful Ozarks we live in.

Rules Of The Road

Rules Of The Road

I had a thought the other day about another trespassing sign I saw. A STOP sign was next to a RR track that was obviously an old abandoned road. You could not see the road for the overgrown grass. I was looking directly at that trespassing sign and really wanting to “break that law” and walk down the path behind the STOP sign and get a picture of that STOP sign from a different perspective.

But that trespassing sign was too intimidating. You now, like “Local man arrested and charged with trespassing, claiming to just be taking pictures” kind of fear. I didn’t go past the sign.

So we were bouncing along the road and there again were these trespassing signs. I asked Avis to say outloud the Lord’s Prayer. We laughed a moment about how long it has been since either of us had thought of the Lord’s Prayer but she did start off with saying it out loud. After a bit of a memory lapse we were able to say most of it.

“and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us” she said.

Trespassing is when you are somewhere you are not suppose to be. When someone trespasses against you, its like they are “in your business” so to speak. Kind of like those trespassing signs. When someone trespasses they are on property where the owner does not want them. I was thinking about the similarity between trespassing and someone doing something that made me angry.

In my mind, I have a way of looking at things and how I want things to happen. Your like that too. We all have a view of the world that is just ours. Dr. Kevin Lehman calls it our own personal logic.

When someone crosses the “fence” so to speak attempts to get me to believe something that is contradictory to my “personal logic” I have to decide if I agree.

When someone crosses the “fence” and does something contradictory to my personal logic, it can cause all kind of havoc in my mind.

“You never do the dishes, this sink is always full of dirty dishes” I use to say. That was my personal logic, and when the dishes had piled up in the sink, my personal logic would take over, and I would want things done my way in my mind, and she had “crossed the fence” into my logic and I was willing to tell her that on my side of the fence we “do the dishes ASAP!” not just when we want to. “Come on now, don’t you see it my way?” would be my logical thinking.

Striking a cord with you? Are you seeing the analogy here? Fences. Personal ways of doing things that are mine, and when my wife, or anyone else fore that matter, crosses the fence, I want to show them “how we do things on my side of the fence.”

So, here I am thinking about trespassing, and wanting to go on the other side of the fence and trespass. I can see the farmer up the hill coming down with his gun in his had, grimice on his face, yelling at me about “being on HIS property.” He has the right to tell me to get off his property, because it was posted right there.

Problem is, we don’t have “no trespassing signs” posted so others don’t know when they are trespassing. We don’t always even know when someone has crossed the fence onto our way of thinking until it is too late and they have violated a law we hold dearly, and we are telling them in no uncertain terms they are wrong, we are right, and that the “law is the law” and they need to abide by it. The law, again, is my way of thinking.

Since I am the sheriff, the jury, the judge, the bailiff, and court recorder all in one, I rule. On my side of the fence I am the law.

It’s my land, my personal logic, and my way of thinking.

In marriage, it’s easy to let some things slide, that don’t matter. But let something that really matters, and it becomes a huge fight. A big issue.

So, I’m thinking about asking that farmer if I could walk out on his land and take a picture of that STOP sign and RR crossing. Maybe he will let me.

So, I’m thinking. Maybe he would be kind and say “sure, young man go right ahead.”

So, I’m thinking, if I had a relationship with him, and he knew me because he was my friend, I might not have too ask him. I might already know he wouldn’t care if I walked into his land and too a picture of the STOP sign and the RR crossing.

So, I’m thinking, maybe if I just got to know my spouse in stead of wanting her to think my way, maybe it would be better if I got on her side of the fence, and got to know her. Maybe then when I crossed the fence into her “personal logic” I would understand better her way of thinking. Or maybe even move my fence line so she can come onto my land a little more often, and I won’t be so offended.

“as we forgive those who trespass against us” it says.

I’m just saying.

Daniel C Clark MSW